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Name:
Josh
Age: 17
Date of Birth: Jan. 24, 1985
(I WANT PRESENTS!)
Grade: 12
Height: 6'
Weight: 200lbs
Eyes: Green, Kate says they aren't
and that they change colors, I think shes a liar.
Favorite Bands: Chimaira, Snot,
Flaw, System of a Down, Taproot, Pre-White Pony
Deftones, Ill Niño, My Ruin
Favorite TV: TRL (just kidding..)
Behind the Music, the Simpsons, good comedians
on Comedy Central, Seinfeld
Favorite Songs: Chimaira - Divination,
Chimaira - Lend a Hand, Ill Niño - Liar,
Flaw - My Letter, Snot - The Box, Guns N Roses
- November Rain, Deftones - Lotion
Hates: Boy bands, Carson Daly,
boring books you have to read for school, most
of my teachers, lots of other things I can't think
of right now...
Wears: Baggy clothes, tshirts
with bands on them, too much jewelry
Life
Story
My story is probably pretty boring actually.
I'm 17. I live in a town that probably has more
cows than people. I mean this seriously, I'm not
trying to sound cool. Until I was about 14 or
15 I listened to nothing but 80's music. Then
I discovered Snot, and quite honestly, I wasn't
very impressed. Then one day in school, I saw
myself tapping my pen to the rhythm of their song
Stoopid. I went home and downloaded their CD and
I've been listening to heavy metal (non 80's)
since. I bought a guitar after working for 3 or
4 days with a friends father for $6.25 an hour.
It is a piece of shit, but I still have it and
play it today, only because I haven't had the
money to buy a new one yet. I've wanted to be
in a band since before I can remember, but even
now that I play an instrument there are no drummers
near me that don't listen to shitty music like
Dave Mathews. I used to try too hard to please
everyone, but now I don't give a shit. People
say I should make a good first impression, but
I think that if you're goign to judge me only
by first impressions, then you aren't worth my
time. A few years ago I developed a passion for
web design, and recently computer graphics. I
hope to one day be a graphic designer or computer
animator and work on shit like Final Fantasy games
or computer generated movies. I got into photography
in the middle of my 11th grade year, although
I was in photography for all of it. Once I figured
out how to use my camera (which was incredibly
easy), I was addicted. I bought a new camera recently,
and I've taken nearly 85-100 photos of nothing.
I have been seriously considering being a photographer
or photo journalist since I like photography.
I'm pretty good at it too. I would have scanned
my photos, but I was in such a rush to get prints
done on the last day of school that most of them
didn't sit in chemicals long enough, and they
turned purple in the light. I spend my summers
doing nothing really. I stay up until 1 AM even
when I have school. In the summer time I'll stay
up until 4 watching infomercials. I always want
to buy the shit on them too. Friends mean more
than anything to me. They are the most important
thing. Without some of them, I'd probably be psycho
or dead or something.
The Time I Almost Died
This particular day, was absolutely horrible.
After a long day of school, I came home. I busied
myself with typical after school activities, eating
and masturbating, in that order without washing
my hands. Once it was 5:00 I turned on the TV
to watch my favorite show in the world, The Simpsons.
I was not, however, greeted by Homer singing "Simpson,
Homer Simpson, he's the greatest guy in history.
From the town of Springfield, he's about to hit
a chestnut tree." No. There was no happy
27 minutes of crazy antics. There was no Magagie
birthday cake. There were no stolen firecrackers.
There was, instead, something truly vile. I know
that you will all understand and fear this, as
I understood and feared the beast. Hollywood Squares
Be Thy Name. Bad humor be thy game. In case you've
never seen this show, its tic tac toe with bad
actors who can't get any other work. I was so
sad. My heart almost stopped... from heartbreak.
I even considered sending a picture of the 6 year
old girl next door to the powers that be at Fox
stating "I am a small girl who is on her
death bed. I have incurible cancer. It is my dying
wish to see the Simpsons every day until I pass
into that big Qwik-E-Mart in the sky." Her
mother wouldn't let me. Well, 6 months later,
Fox wisened up and put the Simpsons back on.
Pictures
I
have several pictures of myself. I'm too lazy
right now to put them up. Ask Tia since she has
5000 pictures of me probably. She's my stalker
=)
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